Preschool Graduation

Well, last night James, Ben and I attended James' preschool graduation. Although he is probably ready for Kindergarten, his late birthday makes him too young- so he will be attending preschool again next year. He'll be a regular "know-it-all" by the time he's done with next year.

So we got to the graduation a little late, but found a seat and began to get settled in. When his teacher put him in line for them the march in and sit in their seats he got this horrified look on his face and told me that he was extremely itchy- this is not the first time he has told me he's too itchy to participate in something. Apparently James gets itchy around the neck and face when he gets nervous about "public speaking/performances." So after a few unsuccessful attempts to persuade him that it wasn't anything to be nervous about, he plopped down next to me and watched most of the graduation from the audience. At the end of the program his class signed the words to "It's A Wonderful World," and for that we were able to convince him to join the class up front. So here's the video and some pictures. James we are so proud of you- you've come a long way, and will never stop amazing us with how much you know and what you are already able to do! We love you our little "Snickle-groober."

A new take on an old parable

As my kids have gotten older I have come to treasure my time in the shower. It seems the quietest part of my day and the time I think the most clearly. It is during these few quiet moments of the day that I often have the most clarity of thought and the strongest impressions from the still small voice of the spirit.

The other day during a rare moment of clarity I had a thought about the Love of our Heavenly Father for us. I guess you could say that I already knew this, but I now feel a deeper understanding and appreciation for this particular insight. the thought occur ed to me just how much our Heavenly Father's love for us has influenced his doctrine and commandments. He doesn't ask us to live our lives a certain way for his benefit, or to add to his "power over us" but because he wants us to be whole so that we can more fully appreciate and feel joy. As I was thinking of this comforting thought the scripture that states that "no unclean thing can dwell in the presence of God" popped into my mind. This too is a principle for our sake. It is not because he can not abide living with an unclean thing, but because on unclean thing can bare His presence. As I was pondering this a modern version of the Ten Virgins came to mind and helped me understand this concept so much more fully.

It's like this: Imagine for a moment that a beloved family member was having a wedding- like your sister, or a very very dear friend, and the wedding was a black tie event. On the day of the wedding you lost track of time and rushed to make it there because you had to be there, but as you showed up you look down and notice that your clothes are filthy and your hair a mess. You would want to hide in the corner and leave just as soon as you could. Then imagine how much worse it would be if you were the maid of honor, or best man at this wedding and had to stand up next to the bride and groom for the whole thing- and then to hear your beloved family member tell you how happy they were that you made it there and that you were so loved for showing up...The very thought of something like that happening makes me want to weep. To experience that because I was too busy before hand watching too much t.v., or judging my neighbor, or looking at pornography, or any other sin that we too often are unwilling to give up to get appropriately dressed for the coming occasion of meeting our Savior.

Our Father and His Son loves us so much they just want us to be able to celebrate with them- and they have given us everything we need to get ready. Essentially He has already provided the dress, shoes, make-up and accessories, all we have to do is willingly put them on.

A Responce to the Soap Box

So my sister Cassy recently wrote a post in her blog about how she feels about premarital sex, and called it her soap box. Well, I too have similar feelings about this "soap box" subject. She mentioned how in our society so many take love and sex so lightly. So for the record- I believe that sex is a gift that has been ordained for a man and woman, legally married. Furthermore I believe that only under these circumstances can it give all that it was intended to, without taking away from the individuals and their relationship. I know there are many people who would call me old-fashioned, among other things, for believing this- and that's okay with me. But as I have reflected on my own experiences, sheltered as many may see it, it saddens me as I see the world around us loosing the magic and innocence that should accompany love.

I remember savoring every sweet and precious moment as I experienced my first love. I was 16 and he took me to the homecoming dance. I remember taking a "moon-lit" walk and feeling the butterflies all evening as I anticipated every touch, and every kind word. That night he held my hand for the first time, and I remember the magic of the moment. He was my first boyfriend and we dated for that whole year. We had been a couple for almost 6 months before he kissed me, and that kiss was a simple and innocent act of affection. I can look back at the whole relationship with fondness and no regrets- he taught me what it was like to be loved and respected not for what my body had to offer, but for who I was inside. Shouldn't every girl have the opportunity to experience the sweet taste of love, uninhibited by lust and sex?

What a precious gift my first love gave me, and in some small way continues to give me as I am able to look back fondly at the tender moments and remember the simple magic of the innocence of it all. For that I will always love him. Thank you- for helping me become the wife, mother and woman that I am today.

Homecoming 1999